My REAL family VS my fantasy family

Do the Holidays bring up issues for you too? Family issues? Wounds from childhood? Okay, we didn't all grow up in the Huxtable residence. I know that I did not, unless imagination counts :) But it's okay the majority of us did not. Most of us have dealt with divorce, abuse, addictions, illness, abandonment, death and more.

In adult life many of us work to remedy the pains of the past...and we do pretty okay. Then all of a sudden December rolls in and we try to get that old family portrait (you know which one I'm talking about- the Sears horrible fake smile pretty family unit pic) nice and shiny again and guess what? It doesn't work! The image of tidings of comfort and joy gets smacked out of our heads and in comes a cold dose of what family is really about for many of us. CHALLENGE, growth and the human experience. I know that not everyone will be able to relate to this but for some it may touch a cord.

It just came to me, just now...after a lot of bumming it. I mean, I've been wishing for a deeper bond and more love and more understanding. Felt like the "different one" again and also pondered lots about the younger generation, wishing to open them up to new ways of thinking and being. I wished that my divorced parents were friends and silently yearned for a real family dinner with all of us in positive harmony. You know what, it wasn't perfect, but it was better than fantasty- it was REAL. Real is why we are here, not illusion. This doesn't mean that I won't aim for better relationships with my family and in general, but I think that first I need to accept : what is...truly except it. Things were actually pretty great when I look back on the positives and release the sucky parts...actually I could say that I shared some very awesome moments with the kids in my family and let my inner child seriously play. One of my favorite Christmas memories was wrestling on the couch with my 7 year of nephew, then we had a tickle party with my 3 year old neice joining in...oh man, I was a kid again.

So I basically don't have the deepest of wisdom and I'm not an expert on family relations, I just needed to share and to create something I guess...and I wanted to say that if we are grateful for what we have, truly grateful, then we always have enough. Life is not meant to be perfect, understanding and living this can ease a lot of our suffering. When I was a kid, I would dream of being a Huxtable cause they had no problem that could not be solved with a song & dance, theatrical performance or heart to heart talk...then everything would be okay (and all within 30 minutes). But this is real life and I love my crazy family and thank the creator for them.

God bless all of you and your crazy families
All the Best

To err is human, to forgive is divine. FORGIVENESS

Dear blog, I'm sorry for neglecting you...please forgive me :)

Forgiveness.

In the past little while I have been bogged down myself by resentment. I admit it. I felt wrongly treated and I have been wearing this resentment like a heavy coat on my back. I tried to just shake it off, distract myself from the heavy coat on my back and do nice things for myself and do nice things for others etc. Some days the coat was so light that I forgot about it and other days it was cumbersome and made me want to scream. I prayed a lot and I attended to my wounds and tried to be kind and gentle with myself but there was one thing that I did not do: FORGIVE, let go with love and move forward.

I could not wrap my mind around this, am I unable to forgive this particular person? Has this person just caused me too much pain and aggravation over the span of my lifetime that it would be better to just disconnect? Was it a lost cause? Or am I supposed to learn something here? Is this challenge a divine part of my personal journey towards growth and healing?

I decided to just let the universe handle it, I surrendered it to the most high and in doing so all the answers began to flow to me in a natural and gentle stream of insight. Which for me proves that if you need clarity, give your problem to the most high and ask for guidance...whoever or whatever the divine means to you doesn't matter as long as you trust, believe and surrender and IT WILL CLEAR UP. I'm telling you, and I'm reminding myself in telling you cause doubt creeps in when fear and lower energies creep in and sometimes it's good to be reminded.

I asked for guidance on this and I now know that I need to forgive and relate to the pain and suffering of that person. It's not personal, it really isn't. I also need to forgive myself and nurture that little girl who still dwells within who just wants hugs and understanding. I am back to a clearer sense of understanding and I decide to align my energy with LOVE in all instances, good , bad and icky.

I just wanted to share that with you, as well as my blessings of LOVE & LIGHT

With God ALL things are possible.

“Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans”

John Lennon

Don't forget to Breathe!!!

Chances are that if you are feeling stressed, you're breathing is shallow and you are not detoxifying your mind, body and soul through your god given gift of breath. It's free and we all have it and it can turn an overwhelmed frenzy of a day into a calm happy one. So why not use it! It can help declutter the mind & heart and get you out of a funky mood fast. Go ahead take it in and let it out.

I sometimes like to imagine releasing all worry on the exhale and visualize receiving divine healing rays on the inhale. Of course you can do anything that suits you.

Here is a wikihow quickie on how to do cleansing breathing:

Step 1
Sit up straight, with your head and neck aligned. Lift and release your shoulders and roll them back a few times to get yourself into a relaxing posture.

Step 2
Rest your eyes shut and gently inhale through the nose slowly and deeply for the count of 5, allowing your lungs to fill and your abdomen to expand.

Step 3
Hold your breath for 5 seconds. Your abdomen will remain expanded, your lungs will be filled and your ribcage will feel expanded as well. Savor the moment and feel yourself centering.

Step 4
Gently exhale for the count of 5, feeling your rib cage and lungs contracting, and your abdomen sinking back down. Slowly repeat your cleansing breath as many times as you wish and enjoy the serenity.


Breathe Easy :)
Peace, love & light

before :(

after :)

Wake up and Live :)

It's so easy to get lost in the fog of every day life. Oh my, the TO DO list grows and grows, then quickly it turns into quick sand and we are overwhelmed. This happens to me on a regular basis because I devote a lot of my energy doing things that do not make my heart sing. I do it because it's the sensible thing to do, because I have got to save money and be a responsible adult...blah, blah, blah! Whatever!!!!! I am working on redefining what it means to be a responsible adult, cause it sure isn't being chained to an office job that you truly don't care about, but try to. I think that being a true responsible adult is about: being true and pursuing the goals in life that speak to your soul and make you truly happy. It's also about healing and learning to love yourself and life and to make the changes needed to be truly happy with your life.

I am working on it! I had been a bit too into getting things done at my office (major changes)...that I did not reserve much energy for the things that matter the most to me. This happens, right? It's okay, we're human. We get lazy at times, especially when it comes to doing for ourselves. We will run ourselves to to ground to help another but when it's time to help ourselves, we normally take a rain check. What's up with that?

Anyway, in terms of my job situation, I am over tired today and slightly irritated at myself and the lack of time and energy that I've put into my true goals in the last couple of weeks. It's not really about the job, it's about me. The truth is, it's a blessings that is enabling me to sort out my SOUL GOALS and also have a little cash flow to contribute to it....yeah I have my good days and resentful days but all in all I'm aware that I am getting what I need when I need it. So THANK YOU GOD!

Well, I'm back and ready to kick my own butt.

I'd like to share something that I keep in my wallet with you, just in case you also need a swift kick in your bum bum aka are lacking the energy to CHANGE aka have no time to live aka have no motivation to do the things that you really want to. I hear you, I am you. This little peice of paper is what prompted me to wake up about 30 minutes ago, coincidence...no, it's all divine.

CHECK IT OUT!

How to realize all of your dreams and goals in life no matter what: spiritual, relationship, career, education, healing etc…All is possible with trust, faith, intention and action. Bless everything with love, even the pain and struggle. Allow love to be the catalyst on every journey. Bless it all. Thank God for everything, see everything as divine. This is the challenge but I have experienced doors of opportunity fly open before me, when I have successfully stayed in this energy.

-1 DECIDE

-2 LINE UP YOUR VIBRATIONS, ACTIONS, WORDS, FEELING AND THOUGHTS WITH YOUR DECISION.

(THAT MEANS NO DOUBT, NO FEAR, NO SECOND GUESSING, NO SEEKING APPROVAL)

Be blessed

Sharing

Briefly, I'd like to say Thank You to those who have joined my blog and also to those who have viewed my blog but have not joined yet. Thanks so much! You are wonderful.

It may seem a bit crazy to express some of your inner most thoughts on the world wide web, trust me I know. I just found out what a blog was relatively recently... lol, this is a new experience for me. I felt a real need to write and share. Life can seem like a roller coaster sometimes on the inside and let's not even talk about the outside world. That is one of the reasons why I share.

Honestly, sharing makes me a bit nervous and I sometimes fear judgement, and that's also why I do it, to face my fears. What is fear anyway? It's a self created prision that keeps on whispering in our ears " you can't" or "you shouldn't". By doing what I fear it takes away it's power and liberates my soul.

Quick story, I have always feared heights and by pushing through it I am now able to stand at the edge of a high cathedral outdoor rooftop. The thought of this very rooftop would have caused my tummy to ache and legs to turn into jello pudding but now, I can go up there and just focus on the beauty.

My goal is to do one thing that is scary or makes me nervous daily. Sometimes, it is just as simple as telling the truth that we are not telling or saying I love you.

Please feel free to share.
Blessings

WHAT IS YOUR SPIRIT TELLING YOU TO DO RIGHT NOW???

Mine says: BREATHE DEEP AND REMAIN CALM :)

My spirit is also always telling me that I should: sing, dance, draw, paint, clean, pray, love, travel, laugh, hug, rest, walk, say "I love you", stop criticizing myself and remove all energies that no longer serve me.

PLEASE SHARE WITH ME...don't be shy!

Sharing is healing....What is your spirit telling you to do? More importantly are you listening?

Lots of love

CHANGES

Today, I am face to face with one of my biggest sources of fear and discomfort: the loss of security. In fact, my four year long job will be changing dramatically and possibly ending very soon. Truth be told it is what my heart has been longing for, my energy has been disconnected from corporate bureaucracies for years…oh who I am kidding, I was never connected to this concrete jungle to begin with.. I recently set my intention on healing and set my sights on training in the field of healing. It’s what I do and what I have been doing for the in increments for more than the past decade of my life. I felt that once I set my mind and finally held a vibration of decision that the universe would line up the rest for me…and it’s happening NOW. The funny thing is that the old patterns that we are purging truly die hard. I’m talking about fear, doubt and scarcity. They creep up on us whenever there is an opportunity to progress and break out of the nut shell that keeps us cosy but also isolated and stunted.

I am hoping to get as many people as I can on my blog, so please share it. My goal is to make it about exchanging ideas.

Here is a question that I would love for you to answer: What energy that is no longer serving you would you like to grow out of? How are you moving beyond your old story. I’ll tell you mine soon.

Lots of love and blessings

#1 Emotional Space Clearing Tip

LOVE YOURSELF: be kind to yourself...if you need a hug, get a hug or hug yourself. If you need rest, rest yourself. If you need to hear kind words, tell yourself how totally awesome you are and remember that you are a divine child of god who is perfect. Never let anyone convince you that you are what you are not, be true to that intuitive force within your core. Listen to your guide, be true and be you.

Affirm to yourself daily: I am a perfect child of god. This doesn't mean that any of us are without flaws, it doesn't mean that we should not aim to grow and evolve. It simply plants the seed of love in our hearts, the very seed from which we were born.

I am in this same process, releasing and clearing so much and making space to heal. It is not easy but everything in this existence that is worth achieving challenges us greatly, can get uncomfortable and can even feel like pain. I like to see it as labour pains...ouch, but hey we ARE being reborn.

Peace, love, light, blessings and SELF LOVE.

PS: Try this: Click the link below.

http://www.deniselinn.com/Mystic-Healing-Portal.html

Peace

Life is not and will not always be pure bliss, the challenges are why we are here and they push us to grow. A very insightful person whom I respect immensely said that you cannot grow and evolve without feeling discomfort- so bless the discomfort- bless everything with love.

I would like to take this opportunity to share a link to my favorite radio station, it's free to listen online anytime. It's talk radio that is filled with tons of positive healing rays. It's called Hayhouse Radio- Radio for your soul and it is. Through my healing journey and as I lovingly create my sacred space (within myself and in my external environment), Hayhouse has been a great support! Thank you to the wonderful talk show hosts, authors and spiritually minded people at Hayhouse.


http://www.hayhouseradio.com/


Blessings

Sacred Space

Sacred space has everything to do with removing old energies that keep us down.

Shopaholic?

"Okay, this is serious now"...I thought to myself while loading the 8th over stuffed rock heavy garbage bag into the backseat of the car. Each bag was filled with clothing; about 50 % of that clothing had never been worn or had been worn once or twice. "This is normal for a city girl on her own...right?" I tried to convince myself to no avail. After a long night with too many thoughts, I realised that the truth was that shopping made me feel better about myself and the right outfit would bring me a sense of confidence. Of course TRUE confidence can only come from within and the establishment of self love and self realization, I know this with all of my heart, however being it is a process. New clothing would make me feel pretty, hopeful and re-invented. Gifts to myself I would call my outfits, but those "gifts" actually ended up sucking energy from me and becoming enormous mountains of clutter. The most valuable gifts cannot be touched because they lay within.

I keep on learning over and over again that material gifts are fleeting. I have a confession to make; I have purchased clothing before with the secret thought that it could change life...no joke. I remember buying a coat that made me look very well put together and felt that it would be the beginning of newer and greater things to come. Of course the coat got linty after awhile and the cloak of hopes faded eventually.

I'm actually thankful for that experience (which has never been outwardly shared); it taught me to look deeper into myself and to realize that it's about who I am and not how I look or what I wear. It's why I am working on changing and growing out of my old habits, thoughts and energies.I am now working on smiling from the inside and not always searching for the perfect outfit to make me shine.

My clothing had ended up drowning me, and so I began to purge! The space clearing that I did yesterday begun at 10am and did not stop till 9:30 pm (breaks included*). I had help for the first 3 hours thankfully; the vast majority of all that time was spent clearing out my closet of clothing! Oh man, did it ever feel great! I felt like weight was being removed from my chest and that I could breathe again or maybe for the first feel the joy of having space to breathe. It's just the beginning but I am now determined to clear my space and make it a mirror of what I want and need in life...clarity, change and progress.

Gandhi said that we should -be the change that we wish to see in the world- I wish to see harmony and love and want to BE that and want my home, family, relationship, career, body, mind and soul to be that. In order to invite change in, there must be some space: some sacred space.

Please share your thoughts and stories with me!
Much love to you Tami